Past/Present/Future Tense

Lisa Belkan writes about media describing Tom and Nicole's kids as adopted, and I don't disagree with the point she ultimately makes that the modifier is rarely necessary and appropriate in media reports, but I could hardly get past her first paragraph:
"Adopted is something you were, not something you are."
That is how parents whose children became theirs describe things. Adoption is an action, they say. And once it is over you are a "child," not an "adopted child." At least most of the time.
Yeah, I used to fall for that line, too, that adoption is a single event that happened in the past and need never impinge on the present.  Here's what I wrote before on this issue:
I remember reading something when Zoe was little that I thought was very clever -- say that your child WAS adopted, not IS adopted, because adopting is just a single event in the past, not part of who your child is now. I thought it very clever because it fit so neatly the "same as" narrative I was sure was right -- adoption is the "same as" having a child by birth, just another way to become a family. What a clever way to render adoption irrelevant to our daily lives, to my child's identity!
What I believe now is that adoption is a life-long issue, and cannot be relegated to a single event in the past.
For an adoptee's view of adoption as past, present or future tense, check out this video blog by adoptee  Astrid of Adoption Mosaic: